JohnYouell.com

Purple Driven Life - Part 1 - Churches That Stand Out - P3

Continued from Part 2

Churches that Stand Out have more than just an uncivilized approach.  They have to have something that allows them to challenge the status quo of a society that celebrates mediocrity.  They must possess something that enables them to breakdown walls and barriers that others see but are afraid to challenge.  This brings us to characteristic number 2 of Church That Stand Out...

2. Divine Boldness.

My two favorite definitions for boldness are: 

(1) not hesitating or fearful in the face of actual or possible danger or rebuff; courageous and daring

(2) beyond the usual limits of conventional thought or action; imaginative. 

Get this inside of you - whether you are tied to FC as a leader or a leader of another ministry - I believe that we are coming to a new day for the church in America.  The culture within the last 10 years has so shifted that it's going to take more and more of a miraculous power and presence to break through the darkness of our society so the light of God can break in.  This is not about worship style...but is about living in the constant presence of the Spirit of God.  This means that we are going to be forced to seek out, as leaders, the presence of God that is required to do bold things.  Business leaders are going to need divine strategies to see their business flourish in the coming years.  Politicians are going to need guidance and empowerment in order to properly govern and protect the people etc. 

Our New Testament leaders met the same type of issue and look at what they prayed...

(Acts 4:29; 31) “Now, Lord, consider their threats and enable your servants to speak your word with great boldness.” “After they prayed, the place where they were meeting was shaken. And they were all filled with the Holy Spirit and spoke the word of God boldly.”

I want to point at two things that have jumped at me as I study this scripture. 

(1) Don't under estimate the importance of the earthquake.  Their prayers not only reach Heaven but they unlocked something that caused the earth to react.  Jesus said in Matthew 24:7 that one of the signs that things were drawing towards an end would be that nature would begin to respond to the spiritual pressures of the eternal conflict ("...there will be famines and earthquakes in many parts of the world.")  Have you ever thought about what it would be like to pray and hit a nerve in the spirit world that would cause the earth itself to respond?  Look I understand this sounds out there but I believe that is the type of prayer and spirit empowerment that we are going to need from here on out. 

(2) Don't forget to notice the result of their prayer - they spoke the word of God boldly.  They took a stand.  They found an inner strength that allowed them to stand up to their culture and shine the light of God truth into the darkness. 

Many times light in the Bible means understanding and darkness means ignorance.  In our foundational scripture it says that no one lights a lamp (brings truth into the house) and then hides it away (ignores what truth has shown them).  But they put that light on display (they live out the truth openly).  We at Fellowship Church cannot do this without the presence of the Spirit of God that helped them to overcome their inner weakness and find the courage to stand boldly into the night an be a light.

Friends, we need the presence of the Spirit of God.  We need the boldness that comes from an assurance that God is with us.  David said, "I will not be afraid for you are with me."  The presence of God gives us the assurance that He is with us and we are not alone.  Churches that stand out may not be the most charismatic worship styled organizations of the future but their people will possess a boldness that comes from a complete and total reliance on the Spirit of God.

CRITICAL QUESTION:  When was the last time you took a bold stand for Christ?

Tomorrow, Characteristic 3 of Churches that Stand Out.

Purple Driven Life - Part 1 - Churches That Stand out - P2

Continued...

The Church, the creation of God through Christ, was not designed to blend in.  It was designed to have a mission and purpose that would cause it to stand out.  Here are three characteristics of churches that stand out.

1.  They have an uncivilized approach.  But God is a civilized God, John.  Really?

(Matthew 3:1-6 NCV) “About that time John the Baptist began preaching in the desert area of Judea. John said, ‘Change your hearts and lives because the kingdom of heaven is near.’ "  “John's clothes were made from camel's hair, and he wore a leather belt around his waist. For food, he ate locusts and wild honey. Many people came ...They confessed their sins, and he baptized them in the Jordan River.”

Here is a guy who preached that we need to change our hearts but also our lives.  If we believe we have God in our heart but never change our lives we have not had an encounter.  Encounters with God are not just about realizing that He loves us unconditionally but it's also allowing that love to unconditionally change us!

Not only was his message interesting but did you check out the clothes and diet?  Clothes were made from camel's hair, leather belt, eating flying insects and drinking honey from a bee hive. HE POSSESSED AN UNCIVILIZED APPROACH!  What was the outcome?  "Many people came...They confessed their sins, and he baptized them in the Jordan River."

(Matthew 21:12-13 NLT) “Jesus went into the Temple and threw out all the people who were buying and selling there. He turned over the tables of those who were exchanging different kinds of money, and he upset the benches of those who were selling doves.  Jesus said to all the people there, "It is written in the Scriptures, 'My Temple will be called a house for prayer.' But you are changing it into a 'hideout for robbers.' ”

Jesus, the Son of God, is depicted in this scene as a man who was so upset that he kicked people out of the building and turned over the furniture!  Then he accused them of using the house of prayer as a place to rob people in the name of ministry.  HE POSSESSED AN UNCIVILIZED APPROACH!  What was the outcome?  Crucifixion on a cross, resurrection from the grave, sits at the right hand of the Father making intercession for us, so that we can be called Children of God!

CRITICAL QUESTION:  When was the last time you had an uncivilized encounter with God?

Tomorrow, Characteristic #2 of Church that Stand Out!

Purple Driven Life - Part 1 - Churches That Stand Out - P1

It has been a fantastic week.  I feel like a new man.  The sun has been shinning, birds singing, wind blowing, weeds growing...Just the other day I was walking through my neighborhood when I noticed several lawns are already green!  How can that be?  Well, they are full of weeds.  Weeds just don't seem to die no matter what weather is thrown at them.  This winter we have found out you can't drown them either!

One of my neighbors just moved in recently to the house that has occupied one of the nicest lawns on the block for years.  I new the previous owner and what he did to keep his yard so lush and weed free.  While talking to the new owner I asked about the lawn care company that usually services the house and if they were going to continue using the same company.  To which the new owner replied, "No...everyone has weeds.  It's part of life."

It' got me thinking about how most of us have just resolved that weeds in our lawn is a part of life.  But here was a man who possessed the best lawn on the block and he was happy to just blend in and let weeds live in his lawn because everyone else has weeds.

In the same way I think that many Christians are content to live with the dark areas of their lives.  We believe our own lies when we convince ourselves that everyone else has dark ares of their lives so ours are no big deal.  We gather around our weaknesses.  We celebrate them together.  The thought of moving beyond them - living without them - that is not even on our radar.  So we blend into the fabric of the very society that we are called to lead to Christ!

For too many Church is now celebrated as the place of the mixed up, messed up, dinged up, drink up, stuck up, split up, anything goes as long as nobody knows place to hang out!

As we begin year two of Fellowship Church, let me emphatically state that Fellowship is a safe community for the messed up and mixed up BUT we are to be known as the place of the fixed up.  As the Body of Christ we are to be a circuit connected to the current of Christ power and love.  A people who not only sing about but begin experiencing the incredible goodness of a God who loved us enough to accept us but also enough to change us.

Here is a scripture that I have been thinking on for over 2 months now.  It is the foundational scripture for this series.  It's Luke 11:33-36

(Luke 11:33-36) "No one lights a lamp and then hides it or puts it under a basket. Instead, it is put on a lampstand to give light to all who enter the room. Your eye is a lamp for your body. A pure eye lets sunshine into your soul. But an evil eye shuts out the light and plunges you into darkness. Make sure that the light you think you have is not really darkness. If you are filled with light, with no dark corners, then your whole life will be radiant, as though a floodlight is shining on you."

I believe that Fellowship Church - an all churches by that matter - are not to be churches that blend in.  I can think of 3 characteristics of churches that blend in.

1.  The strive to keep members happy.  This is the goal of the leadership.  Don't rock the boat - keep the money coming in and the paycheck in the bank.

2.  They stay away from controversial topics.  They basically preach the same messages over, and over and over hoping to duplicate yesterday's results.  They speak to a generations that have come and gone while the current generation is deaf to their communication - not because the message is  out of style but because they are no longer speaking the language of the current culture.  My life long job as a minister of the gospel is to translate the timeless messages of Christ into modern culture and produce eternal results. 

3.  They remain cautious.  They keep doing what they have always done because the have spent so much time figuring it out that their system is now their trophy.  The though of trying anything new has long ago died because they have figured out what they were good at and they have done it so long that they lost the drive to get good at anything else. 

Fellowship Church is not designed to be any of these three.  Let me share with you a little about FC.  Our Mission Statement - the orders which we are destined to carry out - To lead people to become full-time followers of Christ by connecting them to God, His Spirit and each other. 

We truly believe that if we come to know God through the light and life of Jesus Christ, allow His Spirit to fill our hearts and minds, and if we will open our lives up to each other so that no one walks through life alone, we will become full-time followers of Christ in all areas of our lives.

Fellowship Church has four purposes.  They are to REACH people, RENEW their minds and lives, RELATE to each other in small groups and RESPOND to needs in our church, city and culture.

Fellowship Church - any Christ proclaiming, Spirit empowered church is not meant to blend in. 

Tomorrow we will look at 3 signs of churches who stand out.

Retire The Fire Fighter In You

One day I was talking with my wife who was bringing up some future planning issues that we need to look at for our family and ministry commitments.  Sometimes she seemed to just come at me with stuff out of the blue sky and I felt like I need to take action on those items right away because they were coming from her.  (BTW, wise husbands should do this).  Then as we were laughing at ourselves one day when we realized how we seem to be running at break-neck speed with very little time for family planning sessions it dawned on us that we were fire fighters.

A fire fighter runs from one fire to another.  When there is no fire, they are making chili at the station (which I hear is amazing!!!!).  Truth is that they are waiting around for the next fire or emergency to spring them into action.  It's not like they can schedule a 3 alarm fire at 11:00, then rescue a cat at 12:30 followed by another 2 alarm fire at 3:00.  The fire or emergency springs them into action.

Have you every thought about your life in this way?  Does it seem like you move from one issue to the next based on it's emergency at the moment?  Do you progress through your day with little fore planning and thus do not have a sense of purpose to your day?  If you are like us then join us in retiring the fire fighter in you.

Take control of your day and your calendar.  Stop letting life happen to you and determine that you are going to happen to life.  Here are some easy action steps you can take to retire the fire fighter in you.

1.  Have a regular 30 minute meeting together.  

Before the meeting, make a list if items you would like to discuss and give them to each other 30 minutes prior to the meeting.  This allows both parties to think through the topics to be discussed.

2.  Look at your calendar 6 weeks in advance. 

Stop letting this pile up.  In our modern day we are all so busy. It's very easy to over lap each other.  Whether it's nail appointments, hair cuts, workout schedules, etc.  Plan a head so that everyone is on the same page.

3.  Determine what the "win" looks like for you then celebrate every time you win. 

That "win" maybe the lack of frustration in the home because of the planning.  That win may be the working together of people to make things work better.  Whatever the win looks like for you, celebrate it every time it works!

4.  Remember you are on the same team.

It is often necessary to remind each other that you are on the same team.  Do so when you feel the stress of the business of life trying to bring you down.  Team mates support each other and lift each other up.  You can not do all you want to do on your own.  You need others to help you along the way.  Make sure that as a couple, you are helping each other.  No one should cheer your partner on more or better than you.

Steps to Stop Financial Bleeding

 
This past weekend at Fellowship Church we talked about some simple steps to help us stop the bleeding of our finances.  Nothing here is rocket science.  It's just plain old common sense - you know that stuff that we never pay any mind too but always seems to work when we need it.  Here is a summary of some steps you can take to put more money in your bank account at the end of the month that doesn't require getting a second job.

1.  CLEAN THE WOUND - TAKE AN ACCOUNT

The first thing you do when you discover a wound that is bleeding is you clean it.  You do this to stop any infection that may be trying to set in.  This action also allows for the wound to heal without any foreign germs or objects that could hamper the healing process.

In the same way, if you are going to stop the bleeding of your finances, you have to start by taking an account of where your money is going.  This means writing down on paper all of you income and all of your expenses.  Begin taking account for every dollar you spend.  Keep your receipts - all of them - and then group them after a month into corresponding piles - Food, Eating Out, Auto, Fuel, Gas, Electric, etc.

For best results, use a program like Quicken or MS Money.  These can link to your bank account via the internet and download your transactions automatically. You then go through the process of assigning categories to all of your expenses. 

This action shows you how much money you are spending in a specific area.  Most people who don't do this have little to no idea where their money is going - thus the bleeding effect is in full swing.

2.  DETERMINE TREATMENT - SET UP A BUDGET

Once a wound is cleaned, treatment begins in order to help the body heal itself.  This is one of the miracles of the human body - it's ability to heal itself.  But that is not the case with our finances.  Since our finances have no mind of their own the finances themselves are not the real problem.  It's those whose spend the money and make decisions about the money that have to be helped.

A budget is the single most effective way of helping a person change their spending habits.  A budget is simply where we get to tell our money where it is going to go before it can tell us where it's going to go.  The idea here is to take the information from the Account step and plug in the totals into a budget.  Several ideas need to come into play here. 

First, you should shoot to bring all your back bills current.  Slash extra spending where you can apply those funds to the bills you are behind in.  Second, don't jump on the credit cards until you are current in all your bills.  Third, create a debt snowball where you list your debts in order from smallest to largest with their assigned minimum monthly statements.  Take some of the funds you used to bring all bills current and add it to the minimum payment on the smallest debt.  Continue paying this until the note is paid off.  Then take the same total amount you were spending and add it to the second bill until it is paid off.  Then add the amounts you used on the second bill to the third.  Continue in this manner till all your credit cards are paid off.

3.  COMMIT TO EXTENDED MAINTENANCE - REGULAR CHECK-UPS

Serious wounds can often require extended maintenance through various different methods.  Some may have  physical therapy involved.   Others may have medications that they have to take on an ongoing basis.

The area of financial bleeding also requires on going maintenance.  Regular check ups on your spending and comparing them to your budget are necessary to insure that you do not again fall into the trap of owing more than you earn.

A good thought from a great mentor in my life is this...

"When your outflow exceeds your inflow you are sure to implode."

Check out the Financial Tools section of the Fellowship Church website for forms that you can use to help stop the bleeding in your finances.

Renew Your Vision

Have you ever done something so crazy and daring that it surprised even you?

In the movie, The Blind Side, LeAnn Touhy, played by Sandra Bullock, takes in a big young black student who had been living on the streets.  She took him to her home, gave him a place to stay, purchased clothes for him and tried to put a smile on his face.

In one scene, LeAnn is at a luncheon with some other wealthy white wives who began to tease and chide her about helping the young boy.  At one time the even questioned if she felt safe having a young black boy in her home with her teenage daughter.  The issues raised in this scene are astounding to me.  I find it personally sad that there are still people who judge others and their actions based on the color of skin or the side of the tracks where they reside.  Regardless, the true point of the scene is one of LeAnn's friends giving her a hard time for her decision.

Have you ever done something that others challenged you on?  Something so daring and brave that others felt it their duty to tell you why you should not even be trying?

52 weeks ago, a small group of people joined my wife and I in our home and together we began believing God that we could establish a church that would make a difference in Moore, Oklahoma.  I know plenty of people who told me and still tell me that this is a crazy dream and that we are insane for doing what we are doing.  Crazy to believe that God can use us to bring renewal to Moore.

They ask questions like:  How will you fund it?  When will their be a full scale Kids program?  When will their be a youth group?  I have learned you know you are doing something crazy and daring when few come along and offer to do what ever is needed in order to help make the dream a reality.  Thus, I am beginning to believe that God lives in the land of Crazy.

The Bible is full of people whose life was changed and reshaped or renewed by venturing beyond the comfortable lands of familiarity and into the uncharted land of the brave and the bold.  One of my favorite of these such men was Abram. 

Hebrews 11:8 says, "By Faith Abraham, when called to go to a place he would later receive as an inheritance, obeyed and went, even though he did not know where he was going."

In other words....ABRAHAM TOOK A HIKE...OFF THE MAP.

I believe that 2010 is to be a year of revolution not resolution.  A chance to see renewal come to our lives and city.  A chance for a fresh start.  That's the beauty of a new year is it gives everyone a fresh start.

This month I want to encourage and help you discover 5 key areas that have the potential to produce a renewed you in 52 weeks.  But for this to happen we have to begin by talking about how we approach life.

Most of us are comfortable driving in an unknown place as long as we have GPS or a map.

Do you know what a map is though?  Maps are the result of some else's journey.  They are proof that someone else walked here first.  Someone blazed a trail.  Someone was crazy.  But what they truly possessed was more than just craziness.  They possessed vision.

Vision is all about what you see and what you do with that information.

A key component of a good QB is his vision.  Can he read what the defense is going to do and make the proper adjustments to give his team the best opportunity of success?

But...

If he can read the defense and make the proper adjustments but if he fails to throw the ball to the open receive what good is his vision?

In reality, Vision without actions is Blindness.

Hebrews 8:11 says that, "...Abraham obeyed and went..."

That is the picture of a man with vision who saw and acted on what he saw.  That sounds like a man who is living life on his tip toes instead of on his heals.

Let's test your vision today.  Can you list three things that you would like to change about your life or you personally?

Can you now come up with a simple process to change those things?

You see, that takes vision.

Vision isn't about diagnosing a problem but finding a creative solution to it.

You know that map of your life - your habits; your tendencies, etc.  But if you want to renew you, it is imperative that you walk off the map. 

For me this involved embracing a concept that I call, Action Zones instead of resolutions and goals.

These are 5 areas that I want to work on all year.  So at the start of each week, I will look at each of these Action Zones and put one step (goal) for that week in play. So instead of trying to keep a goal or resolution for 52 weeks, I work on my Action Zones in each zone a week at a time.

For example, here are my Action Zones for 2010:

• Rightness
• • (being accountable to a higher standard).
  • Create in me a clean Heart and renew a right spirit within me.
    
    
• Experiences
• • Being open to new experiences each week.
  • Like meeting someone new each week.

• Nurturing
• • Actively displaying my care and love for others in my life.
    
• Empowering
• • This is the idea of having authority and giving it away.
  • This is about building leaders and people for God's glory by giving them room to make mistakes and even failures in an effort to empower them to believe in themselves.
    
• Wholeness
• • Whole people are those who are healthy in the four key areas:  Mind, Body, Heart and Emotions.
  • "Love God with all your heart (HEART), with all your soul (EMOTIONS), with     all your mind (MIND) and with all your strength (BODY)."
    

Tomorrow I will share with you why I believe that Abraham took this hike and how you can take one too.

What a Christmas

Yesterday, we ventured out into the great present from above and had a blast.  We woke up and opened our presents we had bought each other and then ventured into the snow to enjoy the present from above.  A white Christmas has only happened in Oklahoma 12 other times in our states history so this is really special.  Then to add to it, we had a historic amount of snow - 14 inches!  So strange to spend Christmas day shoveling snow out of the driveway and watching cars slide into drifts as high as three feet.  Simply amazing.

I wonder if this is how the shepherds felt with they encountered the greatest present sent from above - the baby Jesus.  Such wonder and amazement as they were participating in a historic moment.  I am sure they knew that the were witnessing something that would be talked about for some time but I bet the had no idea that thousands of years later, their part in the story would still be told - how ordinary men were called upon by God to take part in a historic moment.

Today, as we are out trying to get around in the snow (not having a lot of luck I might add), I hope we will recognize that the God of the ancient story is still calling on ordinary men and women to participate with him in historic moments and the one that you are living right now is so historic that it will not come again.  What are you doing with it?  Are you wasting it?  Are you participating with God in something great?  Don't miss the ordinary in the extraordinary.  The Shepherds say a baby (ordinary) who became the savior of the world (extraordinary).

May the God of the ancient story move on us all to remind us that a savior has been born and it is our invitation to join him in spreading the news.

Well, back to the snow.  Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!!!

How Much Can You Stand?

A few weeks ago I came across a concept of leadership that has been very helpful in my personal progress to become a better leader.  Many of us think that leaders are born.  The truth is, leaders are made.  Yes, there are those who have a special "gifting" from God but they are the exception to the rule.  The vast majority of leaders around the world were made. By this I mean that someone put them in an environment that challenged them, equipped them and instilled in them principles they have applied and thus become great leaders.

I am sure that all of us know of people we think are great leaders.  Have you ever thought about what it took for those people to get to the position they hold on your respect ladder?  They were born just like you.  Crawled in diapers just like you.  Made a mess at the table, in their paints and on the walls of their childhood home - just like you.  So what was it that caused them to go farther faster in comparison to you?  Honestly there are, of course, a lot of factors but there is one that is often overlooked.  These great leaders in your life have developed a key ability that has allowed their leadership to flourish and their organizations to grow.  It's called, Pain Tolerance.

Nothing stays the same. Change is a constant.  We work hard to get our organizations to a place of stability.  Only to find that when we reach that level there is another level that is now in our sights and now our leadership is challenged.  How do we get from HERE to THERE?

We must begin to realize that what it took to get us HERE is not enough to get us THERE.  Something has to change.  Change always precedes growth.  Without change, you would still be in diapers.  But your body changed and along with it, you had to adapt to a new reality - the bathroom. 

When you started you were crawling and trying to survive.  But eventually the time came that crawling was no longer good enough for you and you were ready to go to the next level - walking.  Well guess what?  You may not remember it now but the ability to walk and run that you possess now came at the expense of a lot of falling and scraping of knees. In other words...pain.

Pain accompanies change.  So if you want to lead an organization, you must see that there will be constant growth changes that take place.  Your ability to lead your organization through phases of growth will be directly proportional to your ability to manage personal pain.  Thus, one of the key qualities of all who desire to lead people is a high pain tolerance. 

When it comes down to it, it's not about how many people come to your business or church.  The question is how much pain can you stand?  The greater the pain tolerance, the bigger and better changes you can lead your organization through.

Why do I do it?

After reading the post from yesterday you may be wondering why in the world would I choose to give my life to reaching people when the majority of them could hurt me, misunderstand me, judge me, etc.  It does seem somewhat crazy doesn't it.  Well, I thought I would take a moment and address this thought.

First, I do it because God risked the pain of personal loss so that I could enjoy the personal gain of relationship with him.  Sometime we over look the pain of God in the story of redemption.  The Bible teaches us that God turned his back on his son right at the point of his death.  Have you ever thought how hard that had to be?  I believe in a concept called the Trinity.  The word is not found in the Bible.  It's a man made word to express a thought that is found in the Bible.  The thought that God, Christ and the Holy Spirit are three separate expressions of but yet all together make up a singular God presence.  Think about this for a moment. 

Let's assume that the Trinity is incorrect - that God the father is one being and Christ the son is another - as a parent how hard would it be for you to turn your back on your children?  Incredibly.  But let's now assume that the Trinity concept is right - that God the father and Jesus are different expression of the same presence - how hard is it to turn on yourself? 

This kind of person is often the one who is cutting themselves in the bathroom in an attempt to rid themselves of the demons of their mind and escape the pressure of living.  This kind of pain is extreme.

God risked this kind of pain - not when he sacrificed himself on the cross in the form of Christ - but when all the weight of sin was laid upon Christ.  The pain that humanity inflicted is nothing compared to the pain and aloneness experienced by the Christ on the cross. 

God's love for all of us was that strong.  His pain tolerance was that high.  If he could endure that pain and loss in exchange for the lost being reconnected to himself through relationship...I must believe that He who has called me will give me the strength needed to endure such pain, rejection and turmoil.

Secondly, I truly have a heart for the hurting and having dedicated my life to being Jesus-on-legs to people.

When I struggled with past sins and addictions, it wasn't until someone stepped up in my life and gave me grace when they could have condemned that I met Jesus.  I had studied Him.  I knew the story.  I had prayed (I mean common, I am a PK!)  But I had never MET Him.  This is the trouble we have in the church in America I believe.  We study Him.  We teach Him.  We pray to Him.  But we never truly BECOME Him.

The Bible calls the church the "body of Christ."  For my part, I have chosen to reach out to and love and be merciful to those who others don't.  This puts me in the high risk category for hurt and pain.  It also puts me closer in line with the place where God is and that is never a bad place to be.

Lastly, In the 8 months since starting Fellowship, I have met a lot of people who are hurt, broken, abused and forgotten.  They didn't believe that God really could help them and that their was truly hope for them.  God has used Fellowship, with all it's imperfections and imperfect people to show them a love and a path that they didn't know existed.  When I get discouraged, I read letters sent to me to remind me that the pain is worth it.  The misunderstandings are worth it.  I may not have the largest church on the block but one by one....yard by yard...running the fullback up the middle...we are seeing lives impacted for the God who endured personal pain to bring personal freedom to the world.

Hope for the Hopeless

The holiday season is upon us and I am so excited.  I love the lights...the trees...the presents...the friends.  Oh, that last one hurt a little.  Is it just me or does it seem that friendships and relationships in general are breaking up at an alarming rate?  Just the other day I heard that someone in my life was planning on ending our friendship because I took a stand for grace in a situation that they disagreed with.  Man, these relationship issues are sticky.  Though the holidays are a time of lights on Evergreen trees, there is a lot of darkness and death that people experience during these times as well. 

In the movie, It's A Wonderful Life, Clarence (a second class angel who was trying to earn his wings) is sent to "help" George Baily.  When he asks his superior angel if George is sick, the superior angel replies, "Oh, it's worse than that...he's discouraged."  All of us have been sick in our body.  We go to the doctor and take some medication in an effort to make our body feel better.  But to be sick in the heart is a pain that no drug can cure.  It's a hurt that can quickly lead to depression or a feeling of hopelessness.

The Bible says, “Hope deferred makes the heart sick…” (Proverbs 13:12)  The sickness of the heart is one of the most damaging hurts that we can all experience.  This sickness can lead to many different places.  One of the places that I have been recently was a place of depression.  There is nothing more trying, troublesome, terrific and thrilling to me than planting a church.  And yet, I understand personally this sickness of the heart - this hurt caused by people that can drive a stake so deep into you that you are ready to give up and die.  Though this is a dark time, I also know personally that there is a light at the end of this tunnel.  This too shall pass.  But on the other side now, let me share with you a few things I have come to learn the hard way that Hopelessness causes.

1.  Disorientation

If you had stopped me while on the downward spiral of depression and told me where I was I would not have known it.  "Crazy", I would have said.  When you are spinning out of control you have no reference point to draw from.  You lose your ability to be rational. You get lost in the hurt.

When you go to a doctor and tell the doctor that your side hurts, he is not going to just write you up a prescription.  He is going to perform tests because a doctor understands that your problem is not simply the pain in your side.  When he finds the cause of your pain he can help you treat it.

But its interesting that it is wrong and unprofessional for a doctor to prescribe himself medication.  He is wise enough to help you with your aches and pains but when it comes to his own, it is unethical for him to treat himself.  The medical community understands that when you are hurting you cannot be objective about yourself, you need a fresh set of eyes.

The Bible sums up this hurting persons feelings this way, “Where then is my hope? Who can see any hope for me?” (Job 17:13).  When you are disoriented, you need someone else to come in and help you navigate your hurt but depression tries to keep you alone.

2. Drifting

One time I went fishing all night in Portland, Oregon.  When we left the dock we briefly rowed away from shore.  After fishing all night the sun came up to reveal beautiful mountains, trees and animals stepping through the brush for a morning drink.  But when I looked around I could not find the dock.  We had drifted in the night.  What I didn't realize was that the boat in the night had also turned 180 degrees.  The dock was a ways away but because we had drifted, I didn't know where to look to find dry land.

Anytime we launch into the unknown and push away from the solid ground we are so familiar with drifting is possible.  Add heartache and/or depression and/or hopelessness into the brew and you have a mess on your hands.  

Isaiah says it this way, “We all, like sheep, have gone astray, each of us has turned to his own way.”

3. Despair

People who feel like they have no place to turn, like life is beyond repair, have taken up residence in the land of despair.

Paul, in 2 Corinthians 1:8 shares his feelings of despair, “We were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we despaired even of life.” 

When you get to this point of depression and hopelessness, the light of your heart and life is about to go out.  You will feel like you just want to run away from everything and everyone.  The hurt is so bad that nothing anyone could do is going to make it go away.  But there is power in knowledge. 

I am convinced that most people like me don't know the real causes of the depression that they are facing.  They are very familiar with the symptoms listed above and these absorb their time and conversations constantly.  Here are some of the very 3 common causes of depression.

1.  Death

We have all seen how the death of a loved one effects others.  But what about the death of a relationship?  What about someone you counted on who turns their back on you?  What about a marriage that breaks up?  What about that kind of death?  Believe me, it can start the downward spiral of depression faster than anything else I know.

(1 Corinthians 15:54) “When the perishable has been clothed with the imperishable, and the mortal with immortality, then the saying that is written will come true: "Death has been swallowed up in victory.”

Some of you need to know and begin to believe that there is life after death. 

2.  Debts

Financial pressure is one of the leading causes of marital trouble.  Our country is addicted to the drug of debt.  Our economy is based on it and run by it.  But any and all debt is bad.  Including relationship debt.  That is where someone hurts us, asks our forgiveness and then we hold the debt in our hearts.  We know that we have free hurt coming at some time.  But the Bible says there is only one kind of debt that we should be using.

(Romans 13:8) “Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another, for he who loves his fellowman has fulfilled the law.”

3.  Disputes

Another key cause of depression is unresolved disputes and then being someone who constantly causes them.  Do you know anyone who just always seems to be causing trouble?  Raising issues that never seem to get resolved?  Listen to what the Bible says.

(Proverbs 17:14 NLT) “Beginning a quarrel is like opening a floodgate, so drop the matter before a dispute breaks out.”

Finally, let me give you a few steps that you can take to increase the power of hope in your life and break the downward spiral of depression.

1.  Hope requires trust

(Psalm 42:11) “Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.”

You have to trust in something solid and sure if you are going to stop the drifting effect of depression.  There is nothing more sure and solid than God's love for us all.  Put your trust in Him.

2.  Revive your spirit by getting some rest.

(Psalm 127:2) “It is useless for you to work so hard from early morning until late at night, anxiously working for food to eat; for God gives rest to his loved ones.”

Rest is not the same as sleep.  You can sleep but your mind can race.  Rest is about shutting down the inputs in your life for a while and just relaxing.  Sleep is part of it.  But perhaps you don't think you have the time?  You will either take the time to rest or depression will take years off your life. God give REST to those he loves.

3.  Renew your soul by changing your mind.

(Jeremiah 29:11-13) “Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is - his good, pleasing and perfect will.”

Our actions begin as thoughts.  How we think we become.  If you are tired of being depressed, this scripture gives you the key to transformation - changing your mind.  If you change your mind, you change your actions and reactions to life.

4.  Regain your strength by building your body.

(Isaiah 40:31) “…but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.” 

Your body is a fine tuned machine.  It deserves the right fuel.  Learn how to eat properly.  Exercise 3 times a week.  Drink water instead of soda.  These are all things that will help you to reduce the weight of living that you are putting on your body.  Your body will reward you with a more positive outlook on life, your mind will become clearer, your body stronger, you will have more energy.  Believe me, you can eat your way out of depression.

But John, where is prayer?  Why don't I just have you pray for me?  Well, prayer to me is a constant part of being a full-time follower of Christ.  So it is a given.  As far as me praying for you, I will be happy to but I ask you this question....are you praying for you?  Until you take responsibility for yourself, you will never truly find hope for your hopelessness.